Category Archives: Leading in Pastoral Transition

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What to do When You’re No Longer Trusted

The Ripple You Can't Afford to Ignore

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When a pastor has a moral implosion, the collapse of his character sends shock waves in every direction. Like ripples on the surface of a pond, the resulting consequences from his choices rock the church deeply.

The most obvious shockwaves are physical: what ears hear, and eyes see. Church members hear the news of what he did (possibly struggling to believe it’s true), and his abruptly exit from the ministry is clearly seen (his physical absence is disturbing).

Yet woven amid the physical shockwaves of a moral implosion are powerful heart shockwaves that are too often ignored. One of the most significant is the repercussion of broken trust.

  • Trust is broken because the pastor said one thing but was living another.
  • Trust is broken as it’s now evident how he used his position for himself.
  • Trust is broken as people wonder when he spoke what was a lie and what was the truth.
  • Trust is broken as people feel foolish and angry for being deceived.

The significant and respected role that pastors have in the personal life of church members means that when trust is broken it may be a long time before people are willing to trust someone else in a similar role.

“Trust is like blood pressure. It’s silent, vital to good health, and if abused it can be deadly.”  -Frank Sonnenberg, author of Follow Your Conscience

Church leaders, who are left to pick-up the pieces after an abrupt pastoral departure, need to be aware that the most damaging nature of the broken trust shockwave is not physical but relational.

In addition, there is one other confusing and perplexing aspect of the broken trust shockwave. The damage is not restricted to the relationship between church member and the former pastor. Rightly or wrongly, it often splashes over on the rest of the leadership team. Broken trust with the pastor often results in broken trust with everyone else on the leadership team. Why? Here is what some are thinking:

  • If our pastor was doing this, were some of the rest of our leaders also doing it too?
  • How could our leaders not have known what he was doing? Were they covering it up?
  • If the moral failure was sexual, then often the women of the church wonder if the leadership team has objectified women? They don’t know if they are safe at church.

This scenario presents very real relational challenges to the leadership team. You can’t demand others trust you! Trust is broken quickly but rebuilt slowly. It’s much like a brick wall that collapses to rubble. Rebuilding takes time as one brick after another is put in place.

“When mistrust comes in, loves goes out.” –Irish proverb

Is it possible for the leadership team to design a strategy to rebuild trust? Absolutely. The strategy will need to incorporate at least two elements:

  1. Acknowledge the elephant in the room.

Publicly acknowledge that many in the church may not know if they can trust their leaders. It doesn’t matter if there is any truth to their doubts and skepticism. It’s the impression they have. Simply recognize that is the current tone in the church.

  1. Commit to the process of rebuilding trust.

Since rebuilding trust takes time, promise to work on earning the church’s trust again. Openly admit that this will not be a quick process but it’s important to the leadership team that the church trust them once again.

So once the broken trust is acknowledged, and there is a public commitment to rebuilding it, how do you move forward?

Ken Blanchard in his book Trust Works gives a great model of the key elements of trust. It’s called the ABCD model of trust. Leadership teams can use this model to identify which aspects of trust need attention.

Able
Does the church believe the leadership team has the competence to lead the church? This is more than having an educational degree or the experience of having served in that role for many years. It involves having Spirit-led wisdom, training, and skill.

Believable
Believability is all about a leader’s godly character as revealed in their behavior. Godly leaders have hearts of biblical integrity: what they are in public is what they are in private. They are not motivated by hidden or worldly agendas.

Connected
Trust is built, or rebuilt, when leaders demonstrate a sincere care for those they lead. They are open and available to those they lead. They listen well, they give their full attention in conversations, and they are quick to pray. In short, they are Christ-like shepherds caring for the hearts of others.

Dependable
We trust leaders we can count on. When they give their word, they do it. We can rely on them because we believe they are following the Lord. Dependable leaders stand in the gap and are willing to sacrifice. As Aslan told the first King and Queen of Narnia in The Magician’s Nephew, lead the charge and be the last one in retreat.

All it takes is one of the above elements to be damaged for trust to be broken. And, the more elements in question, the deeper the broken trust, and the more time it will take to rebuild.

When trust is broken, the first step towards rebuilding is to ask and identify which of the four elements of trust has been damaged. As I’ve already mentioned, it doesn’t matter if the accusation is real or only the impression others have. Start right where people are and commit yourself to showing over time how as one of the church leaders you are a person of competence, integrity, who cares, and is reliable.

These four elements of trust can give you a template for building an action plan to rebuild trust with the church. Ask others to give you the time and opportunity to repair what’s been damaged.

Many a man proclaims his own loyalty, but who can find a trustworthy man? -Proverbs 20:6

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How to Respond to Climate Change in Your Church

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One of the most difficult aspects of adjusting to an abrupt pastoral transition in a church is the immediate climate change which occurs. Everyone senses, almost overnight, a chill in the air.

It’s as if a cold front has blown through in the form of an unexpected blizzard which dropped the temperature, froze the ground, and left a thick blanket of snow over everything.

It’s puzzling and disturbing to have the former warm climate of joy, enthusiasm, and expectancy be so quickly replaced by the icy conditions of suspicion, doubt, and sadness.

The question everyone is asking, “We know what happened to our pastor, but what in the world has happened among us?”

Responding to a Church’s Climate Change

Some assume a bad storm has hit, but things will soon clear up. Others fear an ice age has started and nothing will ever be the same. The reality is between the two.

When the senior or lead pastor of a church abruptly leaves, the church enters a new season that is as real as the literal change of seasons –only more sudden. The new season is going to act and feel much like a literal winter.

So how should the church respond to this kind of abrupt climate change?

In the northern hemisphere when we shift to winter, typically the temperature drops, trees and foliage lose their leaves, and the ground gets covered in a blanket of snow. It appears that nature has shut down and nothing is going on. Yet despite appearances, God is at work below the surface where we can’t see!

Our God is accomplishing 4 major things:

  • The soil’s pH factor (the balance between acidic and alkaline) is restored.  For if the soil is too acidic a plant can’t absorb essential nutrients, and if the soil is too alkaline then certain nutrients in the soil become toxic to the plant.
  • The soil is revitalized and rejuvenated by rain and cold weather, for the soil needs a break (rest).
  • Cold weather and dormancy help guard both soil and plants against insects, nematodes and diseases.
  • For permanent plants, their root system is being strengthened and readied for a new season of growth.

If God, who cares for His creation, has this in mind for the ground and plants, how much more does He have good in mind when a church goes through a winter season.

Pray for winter to do its work. -Rick Foster

So back to my question, how do we respond? Pray that winter would do its work!

Specifically, pray that the Lord would do in His church what He intends winter to do for creation.

1. Pray that the Lord would restore the church.

Restore any balance we need in our corporate and our personal lives. Bring us back from any extremes towards which we have drifted.

2. Pray that the Lord would revitalize the church.

We want a joy, passion and enthusiasm for what Christ has done for us, and what He wants to do in our community. May in unity we pursuit Your agenda with all we have.

3. Pray that the Lord would protect the church.

We recognize we are in a spiritual battle and the lives of people are at stake. Guard your flock against temptation, deceptions, lies, and accusations of the evil one.

4. Pray that the Lord would ready the church.

The day will come when a new pastor becomes part of our church family. Prepare us by helping us release the past so we can embrace the new thing You have in mind.

Don’t ignore or resist the climate change that’s occurring in your church because of an abrupt pastoral transition. Instead, embrace it and pray for winter to do its work!

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If your church is experiencing the winter season because your lead or senior pastor has abruptly left, TRM has a number of resources that will benefit the leadership team. These materials will not only provide a common vocabulary for discussing the needs of your church, but they will also help you discern the issues to be addressed in a timely manner.

“Aftermath” is a practical workbook for the leadership team to read which will help them shepherd the church during a season few were prepared for.

“The First 90 Days” outlines how the leadership team approaches the first months in order to position the church to recover from their pastor’s quick exit.

Both resources are immensely practical and give solid biblical guidance on shepherding the church well. Go to the TRM Store to purchase a copy for each leadership team member.

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The Importance of Facing Reality

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“The first responsibility of a leader is to define reality…” -Max Depree

When the lead or senior pastor abruptly exits, amid the resulting confusion, pain and grief, the church needs to be given a loving dose of reality.

They don’t need leaders to live in denial. They don’t need leaders paralyzed in rigidity. Nor do they need leaders who distance themselves from the mess.

The compelling need for the leadership team is to boldly declare what is true about the past, the present and the future. The church needs shepherds to remind them of reality.

Why is it critical to define reality? It will combat the infectious viruses that tend to crop-up in the church at this time that blind eyes, harden hearts, deafen ears, and weaken hands.

Virus #1. Some easily go to extremes. When the lead pastor abruptly leaves, on the one hand some will believe everything has changed (nothing is ever going to be the same again). Or some will go to the other end of the spectrum and believe nothing has changed (they will deny that his leaving has any impact on the church). Neither position is healthy.

Virus #2. Some will struggle with a loss of hope. Their evaluation of the current state of the church is that it’s going downhill, everything is falling apart, the whole thing is about to collapse (so I’m going to bail). And instead of keeping their opinion to themselves, or appropriately engaging with a member of the leadership team, they spread their fear in conversations and on social media.

Virus #3. Some will have unrealistic expectations. Then there are those with a very narrow focus who assert that it’ time to just move on and get back to the way it was. Their insistent suggestion is to form a search team as soon as possible. In their minds, bringing in a new pastor is the answer to most of the problems. Click here for a review of why this is an all too often tragic mistake.

When the senior pastor abruptly leaves, leaving the remaining leadership team with a major mess on their hands, the apostle Paul mentions something that deserves their thoughtful attention.

“Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil.” -Ephesians 5:15-16

When Paul wrote about making the best use of the “time”, he didn’t use the Greek word for a point of time but for a period of time. He wants leaders to understand how to best know and engage in the season they are in. Notice that he says there are wise and unwise ways of doing this.

Just like the literal change of seasons in North America, when the lead pastor abruptly leaves, it shifts the whole church into a new season. The climate and conditions in the body have quickly changed (almost overnight), and there is going to be a new reality, for a season.

There are 3 key elements of the new reality which the leadership team needs to explain.

First element of reality…it is true, some things will never be the same.

The former pastor had unique gifts, personality, and ministry approach. As the “face” of the church, who he was and what he did set the tone. Now that he is gone, the ministry expression of the church will be different, and it will feel different.

Second element of reality…but it is also true some things have not changed.

The biblical vision and purpose of the church is still the same. The character of our God and His work in and for us through Christ and the Holy Spirit have not been altered. We are still His loved children and we still have His Great Commandment and Great Commission mandates to pursue.

Third element of reality, the church is entering a season much like a literal winter.

In some locales winter is uncomfortable and inconvenient as cold temperatures dominate and frequent blizzards hit. The transition season between permanent lead pastors can likewise be uncomfortable and inconvenient for the flock. Yet as in a literal winter, something powerful and necessary is happening below the surface that we don’t often see!

  • The soil’s pH factor (the balance between acidic and alkaline) is restored.  If the soil is too acidic a plant can’t absorb essential nutrients. If the soil is too alkaline then certain nutrients in the soil become toxic to the plant.
  • The soil is revitalized and rejuvenated by rain and cold weather, for the soil needs a break (rest).
  • Cold weather and dormancy help guard both soil and plants against insects, nematodes and diseases.
  • For permanent plants, their root system is being strengthened and readied for a new season of growth.

These are the critical characteristics of reality which the church needs from its leaders as they enter a new season. They need to hear what has changed and what has not. They also need to hear how in the midst of the winter season the Lord will be at work, below the surface, restoring, revitalizing, guarding, and preparing the church for a new season of Christ-honoring ministry that is yet to come.

This is the loving dose of reality the leadership team needs to give to the body. As they do, they are fulfilling their role as shepherds in being purveyors of hope!

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For more specific help on leading the church go to the TRM Store to purchase the workbook “Aftermath” which explains the critical issues a leadership team needs to address after their pastor has abruptly left.

Or the newest resource from TRM is the concise booklet “The First 90 Days” which gives a game plan for leading in those first critical weeks when the pain and confusion of the pastor’s departure threatens the life of the church. For churches wanting personal consultation due to their unique situation, select that option in the TRM Store or contact me directly: rick@interimpastor.org.

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When You’ve Lost Your Pastor, Finding One is Not the Priority

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When He Leaves, Don’t Start a Search!

Photo by Christian Efert on Unsplash

Is finding a new pastor the answer when your former one has moved on? Especially when the previous pastor’s departure was painfully abrupt, is quickly getting a new one on-board the priority?

Most church leadership teams blindly ignore the reality that it’s not if your church will face a pastoral transition but when. So, when the inevitable happens it often creates chaos at the highest level. Wise thinking and objectivity can appear to disappear under the pressure of the moment.

What exactly is the pressure everyone is sensing? It’s called the leadership vacuum. The person who led, and whose vision and values set the tone and direction, is now gone. A hole…a vacuum is created that they once filled. The pressure is to fill the void and fill it swiftly.

“Nature abhors a vacuum.” -Aristotle

This pressure is particularly acute when the pastor’s departure was an abrupt one. Why? Without a leader people start to drift, confusion and frustration set-in over decision-making, competing claims for authority break-out in fights for control.

In addition, some well-meaning members can exert pressure on the leadership team because they believe a church without a pastor is like a ship without a captain. “And we certainly don’t want to run aground!”

Under this kind of internal and external pressure, the church’s leadership team can easily make finding a new pastor their number one priority. After all, filling the leadership vacuum with a new leader will reduce the pressure points.

But is that strategy the wisest approach? Or, could there be other dynamics in play that need to be addressed first?

I would suggest that there are two enormous issues that need prior attention. If they are disregarded, it can significantly endanger the spiritual health of the body for quite some time.

Why should finding a new pastor drop to at least 3rd on the list of priorities?

1. The church is not ready to receive a new pastor.

Even when a church implements a successful succession plan and celebrates the pastor’s transition, it still needs time to let go of their former pastor in order to be able to embrace the new one.

When a pastor, by the grace of God, is able to have a faithful tenure, the church gets used to things being done in a certain way. The body can assume that the former pastor’s personality, style of ministry, and unique gifts are the way, if not the right way. This sets up the next pastor for unfair comparison and critique.

On the other hand, when the pastor’s departure is traumatic because of its abruptness, the church will not be ready to receive a new leader until it works through two issues: grieving the loss and repairing broken trust.

Wisely, many churches bring in an interim pastor to help the church through its pastoral transition. The right interim pastor, with his gifts and specialized training, allows the church to see that a different leader with a different approach can actually be a great blessing.

When critical comparisons evaporate, the deep work of grief is done, and broken trust is restored, the church will be in a position to embrace a new pastor.

2. The church doesn’t know who they should be looking for.

One of the dangers, when a church starts its search process too quickly, is they’ll go to one of two extremes.

Either they’ll look for someone who was just like the former pastor or on the other hand, they’ll try to find someone who is a total opposite. So, get a clone or clear the deck…magnify the former pastor’s strengths or magnify his weaknesses.

Too avoid these extremes, a wise approach is to use the transition season after the former pastor has left to pause, take a deep breath, then carefully and thoughtfully evaluate the church. This is a time to ask profound, provocative, and redemptive questions.

  • Who are we (current internal demographics)?
  • Do we know the community around the church (current external demographics)?
  • Where are we going (clear mission and goals)?
  • How effective are we at sharing the gospel (who has come to Christ recently)?
  • How effective are we at growing disciples (is there progressive maturity taking place)?
  • Therefore, what kind of pastor would ‘fit’ our unique setting and help us be a Great Commandment and Great Commission church?

As with the other high priority I’ve mentioned, an interim pastor can be of significant help in the transition season to help a church wrestle with the specifics of who they should be looking for as the next permanent pastor.

Do not underestimate the internal and external pressure that comes from the leadership vacuum. Get your priorities in the right order so that your church is prepared to enter a new season of Christ-honoring ministry with its new pastor.

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The leadership team of a church faces more pressure than just the leadership vacuum. Especially when the former pastor left abruptly, there are other unique disruptive factors at work that need to be addressed.

Click here to purchase my workbook “Aftermath: Leading the Church After Abrupt Pastoral Transition”. It’s 47 pages will guide a church’s leadership team in those first critical 90-days to lead and shepherd their church well.

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Redemptive Questions for Painful Times

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When asking instead of declaring is the right approach



The importance of asking the right questions.
Photo by Emily Morter on Unsplash

When a senior or lead pastor abruptly leaves, shock waves of change reverberate throughout the church.

One of the temptations the leadership team must guard against will be to simply hunker-down in a defensive posture in order to endure this painful season. The mind-set can easily be, “The church body has experienced so much change recently, they can’t, or shouldn’t have to handle more.”

And yet, those who have studied and led groups through even painful leadership transitions tell us that this unique season is actually a strategic time to take intentional initiative.

The leadership partners at Praxis suggest that in the disruptive season of leadership transition there are 3 redemptive questions to ask.

Instead of putting the church at further risk, the answers to these questions will “demonstrate love, the bearing of burdens, and keeping of trust”. Some might think these questions will pull the church apart, when actually asking these questions will pull everyone together.

Admittedly, the pursuit of answers to these 3 questions will feel counter-intuitive at a time when everyone in your church is still reeling from the abrupt departure of your senior pastor. But wise leaders will gently, yet firmly, push the envelope and ask the following:

Question 1

Where do we have newly-unlocked freedom to be creative?

To think about being creative and trying new things, right after the senior pastor has left, requires facing the issue of loyalty. It can feel disloyal to consider alternative approaches and ideas when the former pastor had his way and his methods.

Yet no one way is perfect. William Bridges in his book Managing Transitions argues that the season right after the exodus of top leadership is a creative time. “People who are sure they have the answers stop asking questions. And people who stop asking questions never challenge the status quo. Without such challenges, an organization can drift slowly into deep trouble…”

Give permission to those who are your committed stake holders to be innovative and think outside the box. How can we do it better (efficiency)? How can we reach more (effectiveness)?

Question 2

Where are there newly-possible opportunities to restore broken norms, flawed assumptions, hurting people, and inefficient channels.

The abrupt departure of the lead pastor can actually bring clarity. If his quick exit is due to a major moral implosion in his life, then typically his hidden sin was also causing a blindness to other broken matters.

Avoid demonizing him or trying to preserve the memory that he was a saint. The reality is like every pastor, he had his own set of weaknesses and strengths. It’s not unusual for the former pastor’s weaknesses to have been overlooked or endured, but with his leaving, now is the time for objective evaluation.

Gather the leadership team and have an honest conversation that probes with questions like these:

  • Is our church’s mission (the way we do church) biblically balanced so that our efforts bring glory to God? How does our church’s ministry measure-up to the Great Commandment and the Great Commission?
  • Has our ministry accepted worldly strategies, standards, or outcomes? What role does marketing, spreadsheets, and organizational structure play in our measure of success?
  • Have we marginalized or ignored certain people groups within our church? Who is hurting at this time that we know about, and are we oblivious to the pain of others?
  • Are we financing and staffing our ministry in the most efficient way possible? What values are behind our resource allocation choices?
  • Has there been a consistent theme of dissent or criticism that we never seriously heard? Are we authentically open to listening and considering the perspectives of others?

Question 3

Where can we as leaders take risks, even sacrificial ones, for the sake of others?

It will take a great deal of humility, but does the leadership team need to confess and ask forgiveness from the church about their choices, insensitivity, or blindness?

Has the abrupt departure of the lead pastor revealed any systemic dysfunction in the church which needs immediate attention?

Does the leadership team need to take extra time to make themselves available to listen? Are there individuals or groups within the church who haven’t sensed they had a “voice” and their concerns or needs were really heard?

Are there ministries within the church that need to end? Are there newly opened windows of opportunity for ministry that need to be grasped?

These 3 redemptive questions are part of a unique mindset leaders can bring to the season of leadership transition which will keep the church from just thinking of surviving but rather thriving.

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For a more in-depth evaluation of the leadership transition season and what specific steps need to be taken to shepherd the church well, go to the TRM Store to purchase a copy of the practical workbook “Aftermath: Leading the Church After Abrupt Pastoral Transition”.

If the trauma of pastoral transition in your church needs a more personal touch, consider the consulting options found in the TRM Store. I bring the experience of helping a variety of churches after their senior pastor had a moral implosion.

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Shepherding Upset Sheep

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When the Grief Emotions of Others Splash on You

The more abrupt the pastor’s departure, the more it disrupts the church. And nowhere is this felt more acutely than in our relationships.

When the senior, or lead pastor, quickly exits for any reason, people are going to react to it as a loss. Depending on how close they were to the epicenter of what happened, it is normal and healthy for there to be grief reactions…even strong ones.  

So in your role as a leader, you can count on this….there will be times when someone will emote all over you in the church lobby, in a phone call, on social media, or via an email. Their emotions might be extreme, raw, even accusatory.

Most of us are not good at handling these moments when that other person pours out their grieving emotions. It feels personal…it’s awkward…we’ll want them to calm down…we’ll want to “fix” them…we’ll be nervous that what we say will make matters worse. Yet as a member of the leadership team, you are tasked with loving the church well through this difficult pastoral transition.

So how do we shepherd when it feels like the sheep are in attack mode? Let me pass along the practical suggestions William Bridges gives in his book “Managing Transitions” on how to respond to the 7 most common grief emotions that typically splash on you:

1. How to deal with denial: treat it as a normal first response in the grief process. It’s a natural self-protective act to pain. Calmly affirm the truth of what has happened, but don’t expect them to immediately accept it.

2. How to deal with anger: listen carefully and acknowledge that their anger is understandable. Don’t take on the blame if it is being misdirected toward you. Encourage them to respond biblically to their anger if they have misbehaved.

3. How to deal with bargaining: distinguish this from real problem-solving. Keep a realistic outlook, and don’t be swayed by their desperate arguments, threats, or impossible promises. It is normal, when experiencing grief, for some to insist that something needs to be done immediately.

4. How to deal with anxiety: their anxiety may be silent or expressed. Just keep feeding them the information as it comes and commiserate with them when it doesn’t. Encourage them to invite the Lord into their anxious feelings (Philippians 4:6-7).

5. How to deal with sadness: this is at the heart of grieving. Encourage people to say what they are feeling and share your sad feelings too. Sympathize. Remind them that the Lord himself was “a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief” (Isaiah 53:3). He understands the burden we feel.

6. How to deal with disorientation: give them the opportunity to get things off their chest. Reassure them that feeling disoriented is natural and others are feeling it too. Check in with them regularly. If the disorientation continues, direct them to a trained grief counselor.

7. How to deal with depression: Make sure they know it’s normal to feel this way, but they need to talk to someone who is trained to help them work through it. Assure them that the leadership team is actively involved in shepherding the church through this painful transition (they need to know matters are not out of control).

There are times when we are oblivious to the obvious. Your response, however these grief emotions come at you, needs to be face-to-face. That other person needs to hear the tone of your voice, they need to see your body language, they need to be able to look you in the eye. They need your personal shepherding.

Only use technology only to acknowledge you have received what they sent, and set up a time to meet together!

As a leader in your church, when the pastor has abruptly left, you may be deeply hurting as you attempt to help others. I’ll address the reality of being a wounded leader in an upcoming blog. Yet if you prepare yourself to respond to these 7 emotions, you can be a calming presence as their intense emotions won’t faze you.

The wonderful result? You will be a purveyor of hope. And you will be a good shepherd of others as you have a faith-filled hope that the Lord is going to make something good come from this loss.

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The first 90 days after the pastor abruptly leaves is a critical time for the church. Most leadership teams need help and assurance in shepherding their church well through this difficult transition.

I produced a workbook that compiles 10 years of my observations as an interim pastor with churches going through abrupt pastoral transition. This publication not only gives you the information you need to know, but each chapter ends with group exercises to apply to your unique setting.

Click here to go to my ‘Store’ to get a copy for each member of your leadership team. Multiple copy discounts available.

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Leading Outside Your Comfort Zone

When your pastor leaves and you’re above your pay-grade

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When the senior pastor abruptly leaves his church, each member of the leadership team is shoved-out of their comfort zone. Who was prepared or trained to lead through this kind of chaotic transition? Most church leaders feel this is definitely out of their pay-grade!

Why is that our reaction? Why do we feel so awkward to lead in situations like this?

Let me ask, when was the last time you flew on an airplane? Remember the emergency exit instructions printed on that card in the seat-back pocket in front of you? The diagram describes what you do and where you go in case of an emergency (which you hope never happens). But what it doesn’t tell you is how it will feel to experience an emergency and how others will react!

(more…)

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The Missing Key to Leading in Pastoral Transition

-How to shepherd well when your pastor abruptly exits

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Photo by Nikko Macaspac on UnSplash

High-level church leaders are smart, resourceful, godly, experienced, and most importantly they want what’s best for their body of believers. But when their senior pastor abruptly leaves, they are rudely shoved into a transition season they not only didn’t expect but weren’t trained to handle. It is so easy to miss the key element to leading in painful times of pastoral transition!

What is that key factor that church leadership teams can’t afford to miss? Let’s start with the obvious, and then drill-down to the ambiguous.

The hasty exit of a senior pastor is a sure signal something has gone terribly wrong.  It’s tragic when an accident or illness suddenly takes his life. It’s heartbreaking when he takes his own life, or when there is the moral implosion of an affair or his hand is caught in the financial cookie jar. And how sad when a pastor announces he is moving on to another ministry, and within days is gone.

What do all these potential scenarios of an abrupt departure have in common?

  • First, the church suddenly has a leadership vacuum: something has changed –he is gone.
  • Second, the fact that the pastor is physically gone embodies what is now missing.
  • And third, if something is missing (and won’t be coming back), then there has been a loss.

Pretty obvious stuff, right?

But it’s understanding and responding to what happens next that is often missed. The loss to the church is not just a loss of function (the bases he used to cover), but it’s a loss that is felt. And here is the often-missed key: when the church experiences loss, the church begins to grieve!

Effective leaders are mindful (both on a corporate and individual level) that change is seen as loss, and our hearts respond to loss by grief.

The church body is going to enter a season of grieving the loss of their pastor. Even if there was no sin involved, but especially if there was, grief will be the common experience. It is this corporate experience of grief which many church leaders underestimate. Its depth will be different for everyone, but its extent will cover most everyone.

To effectively lead in pastoral transition, the leadership team needs to take into account the impact grief will have on the church as a whole. To miss this is to inadvertently hinder the church from recovering from the tragedy.

How do church leaders lovingly address the impact of grief in their church? There are 4 realities about grief which leaders need to embrace. Each of these will help the church over time recover well:

1. Grief is not a problem to fix, but a wound to heal.

A grieving person is not broken. A person’s mourning is a time of recovery.

2. There is no one “right way” to grieve.

Personality, spiritual maturity, and how close they were to the epicenter of loss, all impacts the way in which a person grieves.

3. Everyone works through grief in their own timetable.

Though the stages of grief can be identified, each person will travel through the stages in their own time.

4. One’s current experience with grief has a way of reaching back into our past and bringing into the present all unresolved grief.

When grief isn’t effectively resolved, it compounds upon itself.

When the church leadership team recognizes, embraces, and communicates publicly these 4 truths about grief, it will start to normalize the grief process, and help a church work through it well. This is part of how a leader lovingly shepherds at a painful time!

By the way, if you’re not aware of the damage that is done in a church when it’s senior pastor leaves due to an affair, then sign-up to receive my email newsletter, and I’ll send you my free eBook that outlines the 28 ways a church is hurt.

And if what I’ve described above has unfortunately just happened in your church, and if your team could use someone coming alongside to walk with you as you start this pastoral transition, contact me at rick@interimpastor.org for resources that can be custom fit for your situation.

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